Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Chris Mullin Is My Hero



As a youngster my apparel game was in the gutter. Second hand stores, Salvation Army... you get the picture. Not only was all the gear outdated but it was mad young too. I guess it's because Mom Dukes was a hippie, I don't know, but she loved corduroy. I used to look at her like, "I can't get jiggy wit dis shit," but that didn't stop her from trying to dress the kid like Alfalfa.

This older cat in my neighborhood had all the ill shit. Jordan's, Hugo Boss, Nautica - you name it he had it. He had the ill Gumby cut too, with the mean part and the 3 lines in the side. All the chicks used to dig him. I tried to get some advice from him one day at the park, but he called me Vanilla Ice and basically told me to kick rocks. Vanilla ice?! C'mon son, even back then I knew he was a complete herb. If being the goofy white kid that everyone called Opie was my destiny, I decided I wasn't going down without a fight. I thought maybe if I had a Gumby it would solve my problems, but I knew I'd just end up looking like Guile from Street Fighter. Both my younger brothers were counting on me. How could they respect me as the leader if I was a dweeb? I needed some guidance.

That guidance came in the form of Chris Mullin on a Saturday Morning watching "Inside Stuff" with Ahmad Rashad. Mully was that dude! Silky smooth. He was from NY just like me. My jumper was already butter, plus I had the homemade buzz cut too. The way I saw it I was at least half way there. I started saying "Mully" when I hit shots on kids at the park. Step back on the wing, before I'd even release it - "Mully!" Swish. Even in some wack ass Spaldings I was straight stylin' on 'em. I've always had game, and pretty soon the older dudes started picking me up when they were short a man. "Yo Mully you tryna run?"

After we finished playing one day this fly little honey dip, who was two grades ahead of me, asked if I'd walk her home. She said she'd buy me me a dollar icy, so naturally I accepted. My homies followed a block behind us the whole time but we ignored them. They were all salty because every one of them had tried to get at her already with no success. When we got to her building she gave me a kiss and told me she wanted to be my girlfriend. I just smiled and told her I'd think about it. Way before Macklemore made rocking thrift shop shit cool, I was a cold ass honkey. Thanks Mully. I'm out.

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Menace II Society


Back in the mid 90's Mom Dukes was adamant that the kid didn't watch Rated R movies. Understandable being that I was still a young pup. She wanted me to watch Aladdin, Little Mermaid, and goofy shit like that. I banged with Disney, don't get me wrong, but there's nothing like a gangster flick! So I used to have to go to my homie Dave's crib to watch all the dope joints. His parents didn't speak any English so they didn't know what the hell we were watching. His older brother had all the ill movies too - New Jack City, Juice, everything.

I watched Boyz n the Hood when I was mad young, but at the time it didn't really sink in. Dough boy was cool I guess, but I had no interest in the whole Cali thing. I mean the furthest I had been from NY was Connecticut to visit family for the holidays.

Dave told me his older brother just came through with a new movie but was leaving for work so we could watch it. He didn't have to tell me twice. I was right about to dip and head over to Dave's when my brother, Buckets, asked if he could roll. He was kind of cramping my steelo, but I figured why not. I told him not to say anything to Moms, but I already knew he wouldn't. My Pops taught us not to rat when we were still in diapers.

I'll never forget the first time I saw the movie. That shit was raw; opening scene smacked me right in the melon. "Fuck you say 'bout my mama?!" We were glued to the screen. O-Dog was wildin' out, but Caine was my dude. He was calm but when the time came he was still 'bout it. He stomped shorty's cousin out with the quickness! Plus he had Jada, and she was banging! We didn't have access to 40's so me and Dave hit his Pops stash and started drinking those little bottles of vodka - you know the joints you get on airplanes? We filled them back up with water so he wouldn't notice. (I know, I know... a little young to start drinking.)

I walked home that day with a different swagger, a different rhythm - side fist to palm, smooth stride on that G shit just like Caine. I was on my Cali steez. All I needed was a flannel and some Dickies and I was good money. It didn't last long though. When I woke up the next morning I popped "36 Chambers" in the deck and it was back to the regularly scheduled program... but that was my official introduction to Cali - Menace II Society on VHS. Big ups to the Hughes Brothers. I'm out.